"We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thought. With our thoughts we make the world"- The Dhammapada



Toxic Ties

"All relationships are an energy exchange. Each connection either feeds us power or sucks it away, ie, 'draining' our energy. If we saw all of our relationships from this perspective, we would see that 'toxic ties' are those attachments that cause us to lose personal power"-Katherine Woodward Thomas

When setting out on this journey of living a positive life it is incredibly important with whom we surround ourselves with.  We all have “toxic ties” in our lives. You know exactly who those people are, the ones that always put you down, that never support your believes, and that always make you feel less than for their own personal gain. These people deplete you of your positive energy and rob you of your personal power.  I had many of these people in my life.  The funny thing was that intuitively I knew that these people were not on the same energy vibration as I was, yet I still continued these “friendships”.  I would constantly blame myself and try to rationalize their behaviors by thinking they’re good people at heart. Well guess what? There are a lot of good hearted people out there that release a lot of toxic energy. Whether they mean to or not. And that toxic, negative energy can easily infiltrate your thoughts and make you lose your personal power.  Many times these people belittle your ambitions simply because of their own insecurities. Some feel threatened or competitive.  This is very unfortunate because the reality is that we live in a very abundant world. If that is that attitude you keep that is the world you live in. These people on the other hand do live in a competitive world because that is the reality they have created for themselves. But what they do not realize is that the only person they are in competition with is themselves.

“Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great people make you feel that you too, can become great. When you are seeking to bring big plans into fruition, it is important with whom you regularly associate.  Hang out with friends that are like-minded and who are designing purpose-filled lives. Similarly be that kind of friend for your friends. “- Mark Twain

I love this Mark Twain quote. It speaks worlds of truth. You want to be sure to surround yourselves with people who lift you up and make you feel good. By eliminating the people in your life who suck your energy you make room to attract the people in your life who will really lift you up and inspire you. When I had first broken off my engagement I was surrounded by many toxic ties in my life and felt incredibly alone. The moment I decided to let these ties fall away from my life I was able to make room for all the wonderful people I have in my life today. I changed my attitude towards others and got the idea out of my head that everyone was out to get me. I began to affirm that I was connected to everyone and everything. From then on I began to attract the most incredible and inspiring people in my life.  Ultimately in life we have only two emotions, negative and positive. I choose to only deal with people that evoke a positive emotion in me, whatever that may be. As important as it is to have friends who lift us up, it is equally as important that we do the same for them.

“It's amazing what people will do when you see the best in them, when you honor them, when you respect them. It not only strengthens the relationship, but it will help that other person rise higher.”- Joel Osteen

This quote by Joel Osteen really states it well. When you encourage someone the favor is always returned. As the old saying goes “you get what you give in life”. I know for me every time I think I’m the one inspiring or teaching someone something new the exact opposite happens. That person ends up being the one to have taught me a great lesson and to have inspired me more than they’ll ever know.

It is important that we remember that we live in an abundant world with room for EVERYONE to succeed!  We must believe in each other and push each other to strive for our dreams!

This week I’d like you all to take a step back and reevaluate some of the relationships in your lives. Start to “cut” those toxic ties in your life in order to make room for the wonderful people that will help lift you up and keep you motivated to manifest your dreams.  Get rid of all the people and things that no longer serve you.


  1. Omgoodness!

    I was just having a conversation with my husband about this. 8 months ago I ended a very toxic relationship with a family friend. It was long overdue, and the right decision for ME.

    Let's just say that when things were good with her, ALL was good, she treated me very well. But, when things were bad, she basically abused me emotionally.

    With friends like these who needed enemies?

    She was draining, exhausting, spewed negativity, and had a twisted way of looking at everything.

    In August of 2012 I had enough. It was the last time I was treated like trash. I said my peace, and parted ways. It felt good.

    I decided last year to only surround myself with people that are positive, loving, respect my boundaries, and treat me like the decent human being that I know I am.

    When I see toxic people coming my way, I run the opposite direction. Those individuals will bring you so far down, that you will begin to question who you are.

  2. Thats wonderful to hear!!! It's inspiring to hear stories of people who actually implement these lifestyle changes. Happy to hear that you see the importance in surrounding yourself with positive people you are clearly on the right path in your journey! :)

  3. This is a great blog- one of my favorites. This is something I battled with for a long time in my life, and when I finally cut all the toxic people out of my life, my life improved for the better.

  4. It's such a freeing feeling to cut those ties Natasha! Good for you!